It’s easy to lose touch with people when you’re in a long-distance relationship or working from home. Especially at the time of this post, we’re still in a global pandemic, and many cities are experiencing lockdowns and social distancing.
And when you can’t meet up with a friend or see a partner like usual, it can be hard to maintain a sense of closeness and connection in the relationship. But the good news is that connection (and reconnection, if you’ve already started drifting apart) can be made in small, simple gestures. Sometimes, it’s as easy as sending a thoughtful text message or DM.
Try using one of these 6 messages to stay social, even at a distance.
6 Messages to Send to Stay Connected
1. Plan Your Next Hangout Session
What it is: An invitation to do a specific activity or go to a specific place or event together, even if it’s months in advance
Why it’s important: When you can’t see someone for an extended period of time, and especially if you’re socially distanced from most people in your life, isolating yourself can start to feel dangerously comfortable. This can make it harder, later, to connect with others, and easier to experience issues such as social anxiety. To make sure you don’t get stuck in a rut, send meaningful invitations to hang out in the future, specifying what you want to do and where you want to go together.
2. Give Thanks
What it is: A simple “thank you” message, or even a wholesome meme showing your gratitude
Why it’s important: Virtually everyone wants to be appreciated, and sending a message giving thanks will make both you and the other person feel good. Showing appreciation also helps to solidify your relationships, whether it be with a friend, family member, or romantic partner. And by the way, if it feels too awkward randomly messaging, “Thanks for that time you helped me 6 months ago,” you can try giving a bit of context. Try: “Hey, I’m doing this thing where I’m messaging people who I haven’t messaged in a while, and I thought of you and wanted to thank you for…”
3. “This Reminded Me of You”
What it is: Just as the title says, this is a message where you share something that reminded you of the recipient. It could be an article you read, a video you watched, a movie you heard of, a meme you saw, or anything else!
Why it’s important: Often, we see or hear something that makes us think of someone else. Then, we simply move on and never share it with the other person. But these small moments are what truly connects us. Next time you’re reminded of someone, share it with them and see where the message takes you.
4. The Feeler Message
What it is: A message sent to someone to feel out where your relationship is going. This is especially relevant for those who you talked to on a dating app or who you may have met only once or twice.
Why it’s important: When you’re not sure if a relationship will progress or not, take matters into your own hands and send a message to see what happens. The message can be simple (such as #1 or #3), but it allows you to make a move and see how the other person responds. If they message back and keep the conversation going, great! If not, it might be time to put your energy elsewhere.
5. Ask For Help or Advice
What it is: Asking for help could be as small as asking for a workout recommendation or as big as messaging to say you’re having a hard time and need some emotional support.
Why it’s important: Sometimes it can be hard to verbalize when you need help, but sending a message can offer a simplified option for asking for what you need. Need someone to talk to? Message someone you have a close relationship with. Want advice on a personal issue? Message a trusted friend. Just want someone’s opinion on what recipe to try or where to buy a jacket? Ask your nutritionist acquaintance or your fashionable friend you haven’t spoken to lately. Asking for help and advice honors what you need while also making the other person feel like you trust them and their input.
6. The Check-In Message
What it is: Similar to #5, asking for help is so important to building relationships, and offering help is important too. This message is a simple text to let the other person know that you’re thinking of them and that you’re available if they need you.
Why it’s important: If you’re in a position to comfortably offer emotional support to someone else, sending this kind of message can be extremely comforting for the other person. Keep the check-in message gentle, such as simply asking about what they’ve been up to lately or if they want to chat on the phone. And remember to let the other person lead: avoid pressuring them to talk or do anything else, and respect their personal space and boundaries.